Break

Hi Bloggers!

I know my 14 day long absence is one of the signs of being a really bad blogger, but honestly, I just couldn’t get myself to type anything. Also, since it was the last ten days of Ramadan and then Eid, I didn’t have a second to spare. Now you might think that I may have a lot to tell you, but honestly I don’t. I really have nothing going on in my life that is good enough to write about. Although there is something I could write about, but then I’d sound like a whiner, because all I can think of in the past few days is how suffocating and constricting Kuwait is.

I feel trapped. Like someone is suffocating me, closing access to my windpipe. I can literally feel it. I don’t know whats wrong with this place. Literally. I wanna go someplace natural. Someplace where I can see the bright clear, blue sky and taste the sweetness of the river water. Someplace where no one would find me to teach yet again how to act in front of someone, or what to say to someone or what to wear, or what to feel. I swear; people even tell me how to feel! Its frustrating, everyday, plastering the most fakey-genuine smile you’ve got when I want to really do is cry. Yes! I want to cry! I want to cry because its my will! I want to cry because that’s how I feel at the moment, I don’t feel happy. I don’t feel all flowers and rainbows! Don’t they get it????

I think I feel a little better now, writing it out. It was a mistake to stay away from blogging. I think its kinda my therapy. Ha, and I thought breaks left you feeling refreshed, but this one just made me wanna crawl into a hole and die. Ok, maybe not that bad, but you can understand the intensity of how screwed up I feel.

Laters Bloggers x

 

Dilemma

Yesterday, my parents had a huge row over a stupid issue and they said some pretty stupid things to each other which resulted in them still not talking. Now I know that whenever they fight, it usually takes around 4-5 days for them to be normal again, but this time I feel like its really serious and if I don’t do anything about it, then it may end up really bad. I really don’t know what to do because both of them are at fault and non of them want to accept what they said was wrong. Although I feel my mom was maybe a little wrong, my dad totally blew the issue out of proportion, and that’s when things got bad. If he had just answered the question without making such a big fuss, things would’ve been fine. But no…my dad behaved like a child and to top it off, my mom said something that pushed him off the edge. Now, I feel like mom was more in the right and so I’m supporting her, also because my dad said a lot of bad things to her, she is hurt, so I feel like its my duty to be with her at this time. My dad on the other hand was perfectly fine after the fight, he was behaving normal, like nothing ever took place! So I let him be alone and went to my mom and this upset him. I mean how is it even my fault? My mom was in need of me at that time so I went to her. I didn’t do anything wrong. I hate it when my parents fight, I don’t know who to support because one of them will get upset no matter what I do.